Whaddup Lions and welcome to another comedy centred, relatable post that leads to everyone commenting on how I summarised their feelings so well. Me personally I’m directly in between two sisters so I’m well placed to make this post.
Number one- The Dreaded Day
This was the day when your life changed forever. Not for the better since this represented the day in which you lost all attention because it was the moment when you knew that it spelled the end of your days as the “baby of the family”. This was the day where you made an enemy.
Number two- No more visitors or callers
You see, the new middle children would understand this because they used to get people who visited them, called your parents and asked to speak to you. They make you feel like a million dollars, they made you feel as if you had a solid gold toilet in your bathroom. However now when people phone, then you don’t bother picking up the phone since it’s either for your oldest sibling, youngest or on the off chance your parents’ friends.
Number three- The Dramatic Irony
This is an extension from number two and this is the part when a relative makes this sick joke (and not a good sick). Hey, how does it feel that you don’t have attention any more. *Sees my mortified expression* oh no I was just joking your parents love you they’ll be crazy to stop giving you attention. Bahahahaaha, the irony of that. You low key know the truth so shut up you mechanical pencil without an eraser. Yeah a mechanical pencil without an eraser is useless like YOUR ANNOYING A$$.
Number Four- What’s your name again??
We all go through this is some capacity but middle children suffer this every day. This is when your parents begin to call you by the attention stealer sorry I mean younger sibling’s name. I literally get called by an amalgamation of my younger sister’s name and my own. The other day my mother started checking my ears, teeth and nose because she thought I was my younger sister. MY GRANDPARENTS call me by every single one of their grandkids’ names before they ask me what was your name again? Like WTF I’ve been alive for over twice the amount of time as these snot-rags who shit in their diapers all the time. Plus I’m waaaay hotter than all my siblings and cousins combined… at least I tell myself that to help me sleep at night.
Number Five- Loss of attention
Call this one part 2 of Number Three because this is when the joke comes true. You keep trying to talk to your parents about something important and they’re like “yeah ok, yeah that’s great, ameesing, yeah now please go away while I dote on my favourite children instead of your middle child ass”. This part leads you to feel like your family is like the Kardashian/Jenner family and you’re poor old Rob Kardashian because whatever you do isn’t deemed good enough for your family to accept. Seriously no joke, I could literally win the Nobel Peace prize, go on Ellen with the Cereal Squad and they still wouldn’t notice. Honestly the attention always is on the beloved first born who shall never be forgotten no matter how many kids are had and the youngest who is all precious it’s like my parents are Gollum.
That’s all I got for today, let me know if you can relate to this. Before I go I’d like to clear up that I love my siblings and my family very much despite our frequent differences. I literally only made this post for your entertainment and I hope you can understand that and if you can’t deal with me trying to entertain you then you’re clearly on the wrong blog. Anyways goodbye for now and I’ll see you tomorrow with a post about my weekend. BYEEEE.