How to be Single

What’s going people and welcome to my guide on how to be single. These days I often see pictures of two people being too close for comfort and with the captions goals or I want a boy/girlfriend like this and that crap. Me personally I don’t mind not being in a relationship but some people find it crap and let it ruin their day so today I’ll teach you how to be single like me.

The first step to being single is admitting you’re single. This is easier said than done because yeah it’s easy to look at yourself in the mirror and say you’re single but actually admitting it takes skill. As a previous hopeless romantic this was difficult as I was unable to accept that fact I was better off on my own and that relationships are overrated. But the way you do this is  saying to yourself with conviction the words “I am single and I’m proud of it, may I be forever alone”. Then after this initiation to the single life you feel like all your sins have been washed away.

Step 2 is thinking of all the pros of being single. These include not having to share a house with someone: bed, room and food all included, not having anyone to look good for, and finally not having to impress anyone.

Step 3 is the stage where you initiate single behaviour. These include finding PDA disturbing and gagging at it, going to see a movie by yourself without caring about what people think and do it regularly to maintain your single levels because if you don’t you might start to consider getting a boy/girlfriend. Another example of single behaviour is admiring yourself in the mirror and telling yourself how hot you are.

Step 4 is where it all comes full circle. You find your reason for being single. This may sound dumb but it’s all well and good when you do the first three steps when you recently got out of a relationship but the true single Pringles are separated from the not so single Pringles during this step. This is the time where you finally have a reason for not wanting a relationship. This could be from I simply can’t be bothered to I need to love myself first. My personal reason is because I’m only 16 and I have lots of time for relationships in the future but for now I gotta get through school.

Step 5 is the application of everything and It’s very simple as long as you’ve done the other four steps correctly. All you need to do is be single on a valentines day and do things meant for couples on your own or with a pet. This can range from watching movies together or having a candle lit dinner or maybe buying yourself flowers pretending to be a significant other.  Once you’ve done all those steps then congratulations you’re officially single join the club.

That’s the end of my guide of how to be single it was so much fun to make so please let me know if you want more of these and your thoughts in the comments and maybe like and follow my blog in the process. Goodbye

The Lonely Lion


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